Top 10 behaviors for guys to avoid at the salsa clubs (and not be creepy)

By Guest — October 22, 2013

Top 10 Behaviors for guys to avoid at the salsa clubs

For all of the guys out there wondering what goes through the minds of salseras (or women in general), I sat down with some fellow lady dancers and discussed behaviors that guys should avoid at the club. In any dance culture, there is a certain unspoken etiquette. For those who are new to salsa dancing, these tips may come in handy so that you don’t give the wrong vibe.

1. We don’t endorse the use of force.

Ask the lady to dance with you, don’t Cave man salsa tell her she is going to dance with you. Grabbing her wrist and urging, “Come on. Just one song” does not fly. If she declines, the best reaction is to acknowledge her choice and walk away. No verbal persuasion, cajoling or physical dragging should be utilized – especially when her boyfriend is around. If she gives the bathroom excuse, do not wait for her outside the bathroom- that is just plain creepy.

2. Ask her twice, she’ll turn to ice.

You can ask twice in one night, but not one right after the other. When a song has ended, it is best not to ask her to dance right away. Even if you both seemed to have fun, give it some time and leave her wanting more… that is much better than risking her wanting to push you away.

3. Yakkity Yak? We won’t come back.

Leave the chatting to Cathy! Keep talking to a minimum- exchanging names and where you are from at the beginning of the song is fine, but what the ladies don’t like is when guys sacrifice the dance itself, and end up doing basic step the whole song while chatting. This comes across as hitting on us.

4. Giving advice is not very nice.

A HUGE dancing no-no is giving lessons on the dance floor. Many guys assume the girl is a beginner (and if she is not, this is extremely insulting) and give her lessons or tips while dancing. Advice has its place…in the studio.

5. Look at her eyes, not at the prize

Salsa Staring

Maybe the girl is so enthralling (read: hot) you want to gaze into her eyes (or somewhere else) while dancing–but resist this temptation. It comes across as predatorial. Staring at her the entire time without blinking comes across sort of serial killer-ish. On the other hand, too little eye contact comes across as disinterested. Ladies appreciate a lead who makes eye contact now and then, to “check in”, or establish a connection. This ensures that both of us are having fun.